Senior Seminar Project: LDS Sacred Concert Music

Introduction:

Classical tradition sacred music samples:
Palestrina: Missa Papae Marcelli - Kyrie
George Friederich Handel: Messiah - I Know That My Redeemer Liveth
Franz Schubert: Mass No. 2 in G Major - Credo
Franz Xaver Biebl: Ave Maria
Andrew Lloyd Webber: Requiem - Pie Jesu

LDS sacred music samples:
Leroy Robertson: Oratorio from the Book of Mormon
Merrill Bradshaw: The Restoration - O Lord, I Would Hear Thy Word
Robert Cundick: The Redeemer - And What is it That We Shall Hope For?
Stephen Anderson: Isaiah
Mack Wilberg: Requiem - Requiem Aeternam
Attr. Giulio Caccini, Arr. Mack Wilberg: Alleluia

The first time I heard this arrangement of "Alleluia" was at the Missionary Training Center before setting off for my adventures in Florida. My time there was stressful, but rewarding, as was my entire mission . . . and as has been my life since. The Apostle Russel M. Nielson came to address us on Thanksgiving Day. He played this recording for us, and prompted us to listen to it with a grateful attitude, thinking of the Savior's sacrifice for us and what it meant to each of us, that is, how His grace saves us from sin and enables us to carry our burdens and find peace. The word, "alleluia" or "hallelujah" in Hebrew, he said, signifies gratitude. So I listened and pondered. The Spirit of the Lord and a love for my Savior filled and healed me. I listened again just now, and the same feelings returned. Lately, I have struggled under a lot of pressure, and I don't get along well with pressure. But I have no reason to doubt that Christ loves me, and that my Father in Heaven loves me. They are so merciful, and the Savior's sacrifice makes it possible for them to extend mercy, both through forgiveness and through strength to handle hard things. Christ's grace has uplifted me. He helped me get out of the darkness and feel positive and grateful despite pressure.

More to come on the other samples . . .

Anglo-Saxon Period Social Media (Mid-Fifth Century to 1066)

I've been taking a class on Anglo-Saxon History, so I've had names with "Æthel-" and "Cyn-" and "Ed-" and "Ælf-" running through my head lately. Today I thought, what if these folks had something like Facebook?

It would be called ScopBook.

Friendships:
Æthel and Þane (Retainer)
King and Ealdorman

“Wiglaf is now Beowulf's retainer.”
“Edwin is now exiled.”
“Edwin and Rædwald are now allies.”

Groups:
Closed Group: Æthelfrith's Warband
Closed Group: Thing [assembly] that Meets at the Mound Half a Mile West of the Roman Crossroads
Closed Group: Wuffingas
Open Group: Anglo-Saxons

“Æthelwold joined Group: Viking Raiders”

Religious Status
“Edwin is now Christian”
“Aidan is now Bishop of Lindisfarne”
“Paulinus is now Archbishop of Canterbury”

Political Status
“Edwin is now King of the Northumbrians.”
“Judith is now Queen of Wessex”
“Athelstan is now Ruler over all Kings of the Island.”

Events
King Edgar invited you to an event: King Edgar's Coronation and Consecration. Petecost Day, 973 at Ache-man's city.

Scop Songs (instead of photos)
The Winchester Manuscript tagged King Athelstan and ætheling Edmund in an epic song.
The Winchester Manuscript tagged Edgar, king of the English, in an elegy.

Notifications
“Penda is out to get you. Watch out!”
To monastery of St Augustine: “Noblewoman Ealhburg invited you to accept a grant.”
“Lindisfarne Monastery sent you a request for help in recovering hostages after Viking raid.”
“Comet. Watch out for famine and pestilence.”
“Alfred succeeded Æthelred.”
“Æthelflæd, Lady of the Mercians, invaded Wales.”

About My Book (300 Pages Later)

Since it's been several months and a few hundred pages since I last wrote about my book-in-progress here, I have a bit clearer idea of where it's going. So I'm going to share with you again a little blurb about it. You could call it a fantasy, since it takes place in an imaginary world, involves imaginary races, and works on a sort-of magical system. You could also call it an allegory. My way of understanding the our world comes out in my writing, even if I'm writing about an imaginary world . . . and sometimes even when I'm not trying to draw parallels. I often surprise myself with them.

I'm not going to tell you everything about the magic system and the characters here (so I don't spoil it), but here are some things that might pique your interest.

Some General Background

In this world (called Vael), everyone possesses a glass that they wear as a pendant. Not everyone knows what it's for yet. Sometimes it glows brighter than at other times, but there is always light in it as long as the wearer is alive.

Most of this story takes place in the empire Arlithed, which sprawls over many hundreds of miles and is home to the people of many tribes. It is ruled by a law, which provides for a governing body called the Order of Protectors to defend the people and their liberty. Among the magistrates are two consuls. One wears the Crown, and the other wields the Scepter as a check to the crown. All true crowns derive their authority from laws and principles acknowledged by the people. Any crown of unknown origin could be dangerous. The source of its power must be known.

Characters

Two scullery maids, an Official Taster, a guard, and an advisor to the consuls. All are far from home and find themselves in the same place: the Forum at the capitol of Arlithed, the great empire of the west.

Periwinkle, Daugher of Lily and Herb

Periwinkle and Primrose, the scullery maids come from a Wood Spritish clan. They and other Spritish children had learned their letters from traders. Their parents encouraged them to seek a more comfortable way to live. Rose wants to find her place among the great people in the stories, so she takes Winkle with her to the city to live and work until they can enter the University. As they begin to realize that it might take longer than expected, they find themselves entangled in mounting strife between political powers.

  

Winkle was the first among others her age to learn how to read, but she is shy about speaking the state language (which is the written language). She must battle her fears, not only to satisfy her curiosity, but to find and pursue the right path. Others always seem to think they know where she ought to go, and since they speak louder and more persistently than she does, she often finds herself going where she'd rather not. Will she be able to turn back and find the wonders she reads of and dreams of?

 

Lieutenant Vendil

Holstor-Aelfeld

The Official Taster is a runaway Desert Sprite named Bean. Eating and teasing are his favorite pastimes. (He is the part of the reason Sprites get blamed for all the mischief.) What he really wants is freedom with no attachments or obligations. Then he begins to see how his choices affect others.

 

Vendil, the guard is a member of a long-lived, but mortal race. He has traveled widely, searching for a place and a people he could belong to. Experience showed him both the good and the dark side of humanity. Now that he knows where he belongs, other causes demand his loyalty. He wishes to defend his country and his new friends, but how can he show them the beauty of the land he calls home when he is so far away?

Lady Dorthea Neva-Erl

The advisor, Dorthea lives for the state, an intrepid check to those who seek to assert excessive authority over the people of Arlithed. When she loses what is closest to her heart, only the rumor of a home long forgotten gives her desire to live any hope. Every step she takes is challenged by her foes and other forces. She must learn to trust her friends when her own strength is not enough.

 

After the advent of an unknown crown, the empire begins to fall into the hands of enemies and to fragment. These Sprites and Tall Folk take their part, great or small, to try to hold it together for the sake of its citizens and their liberty. Piece by piece, they learn of greater forces at work than mortal contests for power. The deeper conflict rages most fiercely in their hearts, as it does in the hearts of all mortals. For they are the children of the great Eilefor who fashioned the world for them to live in.

Their hidden enemy envies them. He strives to satisfy his resentment by dragging them away from the path that leads to their true home. They struggle against despair, doubt, confusion, and physical adversaries.

Dorthea must find hope to lift her from despair before it consumes her. Vendil must loose the burden of past pain or he will always run against a barrier. Consequences of Bean's thoughtless choices come around, and he tries to make amends and regain trust. When Rose's dreams fall apart, she begins to flounder. Fear binds Winkle, and she must find courage strong enough and break it or she will forever depend on the whims of those who speak louder. On top of these challenges, many noble, but heavy causes force each to choose between them.

With their eyes, they cannot see Eilefor. Yet he is not hidden to them if they can open their hearts. If they do not trust him, they cannot travel far on the path that leads home. Only as they move forward, step by step, and follow each piece of light can they find the way through the mist. If they do, they must also guide fellow mortals to refuge from impending calamity. In their journeys, culminating in the final battle, each faces two alternatives: eternal liberty or unending captivity.

(Note on the drawings: These are my drawings, but I have a friend who is actually trained in art working on some others.)

Pioneer Day

In Utah (and some folks in Idaho, too), we celebrate Pioneer Day on July 24 to commemorate the day when the first Mormon settlers arrived in the Salt Lake valley in 1847. The Lord had led them there through Brigham Young to escape persecution and to live in peace. (It kind of reminds me of when the Lord led Israel out of oppression in Egypt through Moses to the promised land, though it took them a few years to be ready to enter it.) They experienced a lot of hardship on the way and as they established themselves. Their faith, hard work, and the Lord's promised blessings helped them carry on. Pioneer Day has become a time to remember all those who came before us, forging paths so that we could have many of the blessings that we do today. There are also those who are pioneers for their families today. Here, I want to remember some of my own ancestors who not only made it possible to be here, but who inspire me to work hard to reach my dreams and leave a good legacy for my posterity.

Alfred and Essie Furse

My great-grandparents Furse were born in Enlgand. Both converted to the LDS faith when they were young. While Alfred's family converted as well, Clarissa (Essie) and her sister Elyza were the only converts in their family. In fact, their family wasn't very happy with them joining. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for them to deal with opposition from those they loved. At one point, Essie was a Sunday school teacher. Alfred was younger than her, and was one of the kids in her class. She had to keep him in line.

Eventually, Alfred's family moved to the U.S. and settled in Idaho. Not too far, in fact from where I've been attending school at Brigham Young University-Idaho. Alfred became a cowboy, and thus began many wild adventures. Once, his boss asked him to go get some horses and bring them back. Home wasn't too far out of his way, so he decided to stop by and visit. When he rode into town, he noticed that all the buggies were parked at the church. He guessed it must be Sunday, so he went inside. He sat in the back by his brother Harry, and then he saw her. She was sitting by his parents. He said to Harry, “That's the girl I'm going to marry!” Harry let out a whoop, and everybody turned to see what on earth was going on.

It turned out, the girl was his former Sunday School teacher, Essie. She had come over from England, leaving her family behind, and his parents had given her a place to stay. He pursued her quite persistently, taking her on rides with his parents' buggy, throwing rocks at her window so he could talk to her, etc. His parents said she was too good for him, and she called him crazy. But eventually, she chose him over another fellow who lived in Utah. I try to imagine this couple. She was small and very intelligent, very well-educated. He was an Englishman-turned-cowboy and very sturdy. I won't take the space here to tell of all their adventures, but I will say that at the least, it must have been quite the feat to survive those long, frigid winters in a log cabin. (It's cold enough just walking to class and back.) They raised twelve children, and of course, my Grandpa Furse was one of them.

Anena Simonsen Petty

Earlier on, a family in Denmark converted to the Mormon faith. They had to deal with a lot of persecution that threatened even their children. They wanted to go to America to find safety and to be with other members of their faith, but they couldn't afford the passage to sail all together. So, they sent one or two children at a time. Anena, who was to be my great-great-grandmother, traveled with her sister, Severene. Severene was 11, and Anena was 5. Two sister missionaries agreed to look after the girls on the voyage. It wasn't a very enjoyable trip. You can imagine how their parents worried, and how they must have turned to the Lord, growing in their trust in him to protect them. They made it, and went to stay with their brother in the little town of Ephraim, Utah.

Anne Katrine is one of several ancestors on my mom's side who settled in the Ephraim and Manti area. Today, Ephraim is home to Snow College, where I also attended school and where I made some of my favorite memories. Interestingly, Snow College and BYU-Idaho both started out as church academies in the same year of 1888. If it wasn't for ancestors on both sides of my family and their fellow settlers, I wouldn't have been able to attend both schools. They have been gathering places for so many awesome people I've met (and other great people).

I could tell a lot more stories about my ancestors. There were the Stahelis who came from Switzerland and settled the Santa Clara, Utah. Other ancestors came to the U.S. earlier than the Mormon pioneers as colonists from the Netherlands, England, etc. Some participated in the Revolutionary War to fight for independence. The history of their forbears reaches far back into Europe until it mingles with legends. Ancients recognized mythical heroes for defeating threatening monsters and saving their people. We remember solidly historical heroes for their battles against invaders, for uniting empires and kingdoms. Other heroes, not recognized individually by your average history text books, wielded just as great an influence in the lives of their posterity. And whether or not you feel that has been the case in your family, you can be a hero for your family and their future, defending them and forging paths to a firm foundation.

Furse Family Crest

Motto: Nec desit virtus, or, “Nor let valour be lacking.” Virtus is the Latin source of our word “virtue” and means “strength”.

If you're interested in your family history, this is a  site with free services that has been helpful to me: FamilySearch

Rexburg Flood July 15, 2014

This, dear readers, is more along the lines of news. Two days ago, my college town of Rexburg, Idaho got flooded literally out of the blue. (And I mean "literally" in its true sense.) No one was expecting it. The weather was, for the most part, sun-shiny and warm. I remember thinking on the way between my apartment and campus that it would be nice if it rained. I went in for a little TA work at four, and got done close to five. I stopped by the library to drop off some books about novel-writing, then by the Crossroads for a cheap chicken sandwich since I had plans and no time to make a proper dinner. There's an indoor walkway between the two buildings (which is very convenient when the temperature outside is below zero and the wind is blowing and trying to freeze off people's noses). As I passed through the walkway, I stared out the windows at the rain, which turned to pounding hail. I was glad of the rain, but didn't think much of it or even the hail in July. After all, this is Rexburg. You can expect the unexpected here when it comes to weather. Besides, my little home town in sizzling southern Utah got hit with hail one summer. (It destroyed our poor onions.) So why not Rexburg?

I happened to meet a fellow member of a writers' group. She informed me that our meetings had been cancelled for that evening and the next. Then, I met one of my friends outside the BYU-Idaho Center (imaginative name, I know, but it's a pretty cool building). We hustled to my apartment and sat out under the porch. The cool weather was nice for a change. When the rain started sprinkling us, we decided to go inside since we were working on a project that involved paper. I kept getting distracted, though, by the downpour. It reminded me of rainstorms in Florida. Here's a little video I took:

Then, my roommate called to me to look out back. This is what we saw:

Eventually it dawned on us that some folks might need help. Crazy as Rexburg weather is, this didn't happen every day. So, we went out and found that lots of other students already had the same idea. We were out until about midnight tossing water out of people's basements and lower-level apartments. Some people were probably out later. Of course, somebody ordered pizza at both places we worked at. Pizza is just a given when there's a gathering of LDS college students (or maybe all college students) just like Jell-O salad is a given at any LDS gathering in Utah. At one house, a girl was going around stuffing pizza, doughnuts, and bottled water into people's mouths because nobody would stop working to eat.

By the end of the night, my feet were numb from being wet all that time. It was interesting running home. Not long after I cleaned up and got ready for bed, I got a text from my dad asking if I was alright. Apparently, the flood was on the news.

In the morning, I got up to go to work again, this time for a regular shift. All the teachers and the head secretary of the department were discussing the flood and asking if each other had been affected. Some from Idaho Falls said they hadn't seen any (or much) rain at all. The secretary said that as she had passed by Rigby Lake on the way home from work, people were out sunning and having a good time. So it seems the storm was very isolated. Rexburg is on the slope of a long hill. The water had gathered and swooped down, filling in the low places.

They didn't cancel school. It's an interesting time to have a flood, seeing as finals are next week. To the chagrin of many students, they opened up the testing center again, even though it had been flooded. I received several emails from the school about precautions and information, as well as a plea to teachers to be understanding with students who had been seriously affected by the flood. They opened up one of the buildings as a shelter. Only one building was closed for safety reasons, and it was the same building we would have had our writers' workshop in.

So, that was our adventure for the week. I've experienced lots of interesting weather the last few months, from a couple of tropical storms in Florida to a freak snowstorm in southern Utah to this. It's always good to be prepared and ready to pitch in. My family has a tradition, encouraged by the leaders of the church, of keeping 72-hour kits and food storage, updating them periodically. Our hometown has a brilliant system in place in case of emergencies. The city is divided into districts, largely based on the LDS ward boundaries, since they are already organized. Each district has a chairperson and is divided into blocks. Block captains have been assigned. They gather information on everyone's area of expertise that could be helpful in an emergency and on people's special needs that would require particular attention. Every household has a little doorknob tab with a green side for "OK" and a red side for "Help!" In case of a natural disaster or other such emergency, the block captain goes out to check for anyone that needs help. Then, they report to the district chair, who reports to the city. That way, the city knows exactly where to send professional help. Every few months, the block captains meet to get training and update information. Every year in September, the city conducts a drill. The block captains send out notices about the drill to everyone, along with other helpful information.

Hopefully, when something happens, we'll be able to bypass a lot of problems with this system. Confusion only amplifies the danger. There is also comfort in knowing that an organized system is in place and that someone will be there to check on you and your family and see that help gets to you if needed.

It's a lot like the church is organized. We have a system in place so that ideally, everyone is looked after by each other. We see to each other's temporal, emotional, and spiritual needs through visiting teaching, home teaching, and such. It's neat to know that wherever you go, whatever ward you're part of, you don't have to be alone. It's just another way of God showing all his children that he loves them.

Independence

I want to begin by thanking all those, whether on the battlefield or at home, who have fought to defend our liberty and our independence from those who would seek to oppress us. I hope I will use that gift wisely.

What is the American dream?

When we think of the American dream, a lot of us probably picture a nice, big house and a nice, fancy car and a lot of exotic vacations. We see this as the result of having the opportunity to climb a ladder to the top. It's certainly better than having no chance at all, but is that really all it is? Is that the cause that the patriots seceded from England for?

Now, there were some problems with how to deal with money on the surface. But the issue wasn't so much taxes as it was taxes without representation.

The American dream is the freedom to choose your dream. You may succeed at it. You may fail. You may even find out that it's not as fulfilling as you thought it would be. Freedom doesn't guarantee that everything will be sugar plums and rainbows all your life.

The Burden and Beauty of freedom: Responsibility

Freedom means hard decisions and hard work if you want to get anywhere. (You could just choose to be a couch potato all your life and not get or become anything.) It means making mistakes and doing things right, and learning from the consequences of both. If you do get somewhere, it means so much more to you because you chose it and put in the effort. It might not be luxury. It might be an accomplishment that you are passionate about. It might be a happy family. It might be spiritual well-being. It could be several things. The point is this: you get to decide who you are.

Give Up Responsibility?

Suppose you decided that being responsible was too hard. You want to choose, but you don't want to deal with some of the natural consequences because they might be less pleasant than the thing you chose to do. There's no getting out of consequences in the long run. Whatever you do has an effect on you, and usually on others.

Turn the page, and maybe you want good consequences that come from good choices. Well, that's fine. But making decisions is so hard! What if you mess up and get a bad consequence? It's risky! So, you want to give your decisions to other people who promise to make the right choices and send good things your way. That's easy enough. But why on earth would you trust other fallible, mortal beings who don't even know you and all your circumstances with your decisions? The only way that you can determine what the consequences are is if you make the decisions and act on them.

Now, that doesn't mean that you can't go to others for advice, or even consider unsolicited advice. Taking some wise advice does not make you weak or dependent. You might have to swallow your pride to do so, but that actually makes you stronger. Making a good decision means being aware of and weighing the options. Then you choose.

That also goes for accepting help. If someone is choosing to offer you assistance, and you need it, there's no shame in taking it. Allowing someone to serve you will allow them to grow as a person, and it does good to you too.

Government's Responsibility: Protect Freedom

So, what does all this have to do with political liberty? The principles of freedom and responsibility have a lot to do with the role of government in our lives. Do we want a government that protects our basic rights, which includes the pursuit of happiness? Or do we want a government that decides most things for us and gives us nice (or not so nice) things? With the latter option, that's a lot of responsibility to put into the hands of a few. It takes away some of the essence of who we are. It lays a heavy burden on our leaders, whether they are competent or not, as in the words of King Henry in the third act of Shakespeare's Henry V¹:

Vpon the King, let vs our Liues, our Soules,
Our Debts, our carefull Wiues,
Our Children, and our Sinnes, lay on the King:
We must beare all.
O hard Condition, Twin-borne with Greatnesse,
Subiect to the breath of euery foole, whose sence
No more can feele, but his owne wringing.
What infinite hearts-ease must Kings neglect,
That priuate men enioy?

(A lot of the U's and V's were interchanged, if that helps it make sense.)

. . . And also as in the words of King Mosiah, who saw the need to change the form of government. (He was a Nephite king in The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ):

32. And now I desire that this inequality should be no more in this land, especially among this my people; but I desire that this land be a land of liberty, and every man may enjoy his rights and privileges alike, so long as the Lord sees fit that we may live and inherit the land, yea, even as long as any of our posterity remains upon the face of the land.

33. And many more things did king Mosiah write unto them, unfolding unto them all the trials and troubles of a righteous king, yea, all the travails of soul for their people, and also all the murmurings of the people to their king; and he explained it all unto them.

34. And he told them that these things ought not to be; but that the burden should come upon all the people, that every man might bear his part.²

More Than Politics

Everything discussed here stems from concepts deeper than politics. Our liberty is tied to our very essence as human beings. God loves us and wants us to be happy. He gives us commandments with the intent that if we choose to keep them, we will be blessed. He does not force us, though. He gives us the choice and then offers us help and mercy for when we need it. That's the only way we can really be happy: if we choose happiness, as explained in the book of Alma (emphasis added):

3. And it is requisite with the justice of God that men should be judged according to their works; and if their works were good in this life, and the desires of their hearts were good, that they should also, at the last day, be restored unto that which is good.

4. And if their works are evil they shall be restored unto them for evil. Therefore, all things shall be restored to their proper order, every thing to its natural frame—mortality raised to immortality, corruption to incorruption—raised to endless happiness to inherit the kingdom of God, or to endless misery to inherit the kingdom of the devil, the one on one hand, the other on the other—

5. The one raised to happiness according to his desires of happiness, or good according to his desires of good; and the other to evil according to his desires of evil; for as he has desired to do evil all the day long even so shall he have his reward of evil when the night cometh.

6. And so it is on the other hand. If he hath repented of his sins, and desired righteousness until the end of his days, even so he shall be rewarded unto righteousness.

7. These are they that are redeemed of the Lord; yea, these are they that are taken out, that are delivered from that endless night of darkness; and thus they stand or fall; for behold, they are their own judges, whether to do good or do evil.

8. Now, the decrees of God are unalterable; therefore, the way is prepared that whosoever will may walk therein and be saved.³

So, let's go back really quickly to the story of the Nephites and their new independence:

38. Therefore they relinquished their desires for a king, and became exceedingly anxious that every man should have an equal chance throughout all the land; yea, and every man expressed a willingness to answer for his own sins.

39. Therefore, it came to pass that they assembled themselves together in bodies throughout the land, to cast in their voices concerning who should be their judges, to judge them according to the law which had been given them; and they were exceedingly rejoiced because of the liberty which had been granted unto them.⁴

The real American dream has been around for a long time. It's just been recently recognized again. We also have a law (the Constitution), and we get to choose what kind of people represent us. The Constitution was set up as a parameter for those we appoint in preserving our basic rights and liberties so that they don't overstep their bounds and take them away. Let's continue to defend our independence. Let's take responsibility for our choices and actions and enjoy the fruits of doing -- and being -- good. Perhaps they won't come right away, but they will. God keeps his promises. He's kept his promises to me, and I trust that he will continue to do so.

1Shakespeare, William. Henry V. http://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/2253/pg2253.html

2The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ, Mosiah 29: 32-34. https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/mosiah/29?lang=eng

3The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ, Alma 43:3-6. https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/alma/41?lang=eng

4The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ, Mosiah 29: 38-39. https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/mosiah/29?lang=eng

Character Analysis to Self-Analysis

As a writer, you can discover interesting things about yourself and about the world and existence in general. To be a good writer (which I'm still working on), you have to be observant and thoughtful. Otherwise, you'll just end up with flimsy fluff (like most store-bought bread). Particularly, if you're writing stories about people, fictional or not, you have to know something about people. That's a challenge for us introverts. We know a lot about ourselves, but not so much about how other people think. We have to learn to look outside of ourselves a little bit. Sometimes, it's surprising what we learn about ourselves when we do. It's like a little chick breaking out of the eggshell into the sunlight and finding out that it's yellow compared to other things around it. (I wonder how much color chickens can actually see. That's a question for another day.)

The other day, I decided I needed to examine the psyche one of my characters more closely. I knew she had some issues to deal with, but I wanted a clearer picture so I could write her more like a real person. So for starters, I looked around at some very basic articles about anxiety disorders. (As a student, I prefer academic articles, but I'm not a student of psychology. You have to start somewhere.)

I learned that OCD is a form of anxiety¹. I never knew it, but it makes sense. When you have anxiety, you are afraid of bad things happening in the future. When you have OCD, you perform rituals and routines in order to prevent something bad from happening. As I read about all this, I started to learn something about myself. I don't think I have any serious condition, but I have noticed a few symptoms. Though I am more relaxed than I used to be, I've caught myself worrying excessively or doing little things to prevent or avoid something I fear. I wash my hands probably more than I need to. (I must say, I don't get sick very often. There could be other reasons for that, though.) I often have impulses to double- or triple-check things. I read that resisting these impulses and NOT doing these things unnecessarily can help eliminate the anxiety.

I've been trying that more consciously the last few days. It works. (For me anyway.) It's a burden off the shoulders. For several years now (it makes me feel old to say that) I've been telling myself over and over that worrying usually doesn't do any good. I've seen the debilitating effects of worrying in the lives of people I love – and in my own. It's no fun. Better to take life one step at a time and remember to trust God. I know that for some folks, it's easier said than done, and they might need more outside help. That's ok. We all have challenges that we need help and effort to overcome. Of course, the Savior is the ultimate healer, who offers peace in the middle of hard times. Many times, I have felt it while in tears and on my knees or while reading the holy scriptures, or while even just turning my thoughts to Him instead of dwelling on my worries. Fear is the opposite of faith and hope. Real faith banishes fear. God knows what we need, and when we need it. One day's challenges are enough to take at once (Matthew 6:31-34², 3 Nephi 13:31-34)³. You don't have to take on the burden of all the days of the future, or of things that might not even happen. Christ already took on all our burdens so He would know how to help us (Alma 7:11-12)⁴.

Writing is awesome. :) It can really lead to enlightenment. I highly recommend it.

1 http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/ocd.html#cat20123

2 Matthew 6:31-34

3 3 Nephi 13:31-34

4 Alma 7:11-12